I don’t watch horror movies. I can’t. For days after, my stress levels go up, I get jumpy walking around corners, and I have nightmares with shockingly similar scenarios to scenes from the movie. So when I watch TV shows or read books, I’m thoughtful about the images I let enter my mind – knowing they’ll be there far longer than I’d wish.

Recently, I’ve been having nightmares again. I’ve been jumpy – checking behind shower curtains and turning on lights quickly. The lack of sleep rolls over into tiredness during the day and I find myself eating more chocolate than I’d care to admit, hoping the sugar rush will boost my energy and my spirits.

Because the world right now is filled with images from horror movies. Hospitals without beds. Loved ones without proper burials. Masked encounters at the grocery store. Your heart stopping at the sound of a sneeze. The phone call that brings the sudden switch to isolating at home. Add to that violence at the core of our country. Police running away from citizens they’ve sworn to protect. Smashed windows and guns positioned and senators with gas masks. Social media feeds filled with people taking stances – further distancing them from their neighbor.

This week I’ve been reading a lot about Jesus’ last night with his disciples. On that night, he stood up from dinner, took a towel and a basin of water and washed their feet. He said Follow my example. Just as I do, you must do too. I give you this new commandment – Love. Love the way I do. Love each other, love your neighbor, love with that all consuming ever giving service kind of love. Measure your love on my example.

At dinner, as they remembered the Passover and God’s rescue of a people oppressed, Jesus took food and drink – the very things that give us life, and said when you break bread, remember me. When you take a drink remember me. Remember the things that I taught and the ways I showed you. Remember love.

So today, when the images are burned too clearly in my mind – I look for my water bottle. I take a drink. I get a towel and I wash my hands. I let those familiar actions remind me that the way I’m called to – the way we’re called to – is one of Love. And that, if nothing else, will carry us through the nightmares.

 

Jocelyn Wildhack is our Chaplain and Camp Director. She is soon to be ordained as a minister in the Presbyterian Church (USA).